STONY BROOK, NEW YORK — Jiten Patel is a Freshman Chemistry major at Stony Brook University.
He had hoped to go home early on Friday to attend his mother’s 68th birthday party, expecting to quickly finish his Chemistry Titration Lab.
However, Jiten would meet his greatest foe yet: Phenolphthalein. Fiddling with the buret, he looked exasperated.
“My mom already loves my older brother more, since he’s a Biochemistry major at Binghamton. If I miss her birthday, she might stop sending my once-a-year ‘you are just okay’ text.”
Adding the proper amount of titrant is delicate work, like navigating the comments section of a Facebook article on climate change.
Professor Greta Thundergoesbachung, an adjunct chemistry professor at the University, understands why students might find this particular lab difficult.
“Titrating is hard. Almost as hard as paying my bills with this adjunct salary,” said Professor Thundergoesbachung, who talked to us in her car/home/bathroom.
The experts (WikiHow) recommends that students should be careful when adjusting the burette (not to be confused with baguette).
The color of the indicator solution seems to change faster than the United States Congress’s moral campus during an election year.
Mandy Wong, the Graduate Teaching Assistant for Jiten’s section, is puzzled on why so many undergraduates are not finding the lab as easy as it is for her.
“Titration labs are not difficult. It’s really easy. I’ve been in college for the last 32 years of my life, and it just comes to me. Why isn’t it coming to them [undergraduates]? They obviously aren’t trying hard enough.”
Chemistry Department Chair Thomas Scott insists that labs are essential.
“Chemistry labs help create a well-balanced education by showing science beyond abstract theories found in textbooks. Also, your lab fees for equipment, notebooks, and attire, are basically the reason why I own 4 homes.”
Jiten remains optimistic.
“This is probably the hardest chemistry-related thing I am ever going to do,” said Jiten, who is currently signed up for organic chemistry next semester.
