STANFORD, CALIFORNIA — Stanford University is renowned for its trees and Art History Department. Still, the administration also wants to remind you about how great they are for students’ wellbeing.
Dean of Students Faye Deal recently announced the University’s innovative mental health plan. It places less of an emphasis on traditional therapy and more on giving students access to puppies.
“Students need doggos, not structural support from academic institutions,” said Dean Deal.
Supplementing this strategy, Stanford is making sure to schedule finals in an as inconvenient way as possible for its undergraduates.
This includes the possibility of having multiple in a single day, all across campus. But they made sure to space the breaks in a way to give just barely enough time to get to each testing center.
Some students are elated by the strategy. “I sacrificed sleep and my health for four years of high school to get accepted here, so I obviously want to do the same for four more years,” said Freshman Bill Tolab.
However, some faculty members have expressed concerns over the policy shift.
Professor Ihav Tenore believes the University is short-sighted with the change.
“Students do not need puppies. They need those smol goats. So kawaii~!” said Professor Tenore.
Sophomore Alice Chen, another proponent of Stanford’s new mental health strategy, spoke on its benefits during the post-decision University town hall.
“Honestly, I love that the administration didn’t bother to solicit feedback from the students this new policy change will actually impact. Just decided to implement it on a whim, then let us know through a short email after-the-fact. This allows me to focus on the things that really matter, like biochemistry,” said Alice.
With the positive reception received, Stanford is considering a slew of new initiatives. This includes raising the cost of tuition, reducing accessibility to campus buildings, switching to one-ply toilet paper, and reducing the number of dining hall food options.
